How are you with No?



How are you with No?

Last week’s blog-post was about asking for help. And, if we are to develop true skill in asking for help we need to grow our capacity to handle No – both the no inside ourselves and the no we may meet in another.

Many of us find it excruciatingly difficult to feel or express our own No’s. We were never taught the importance of our own boundaries or shown by others a respect and value for our No’s. And so we develop our lives and relationships, with an absence of No’s, often mistakenly thinking we will be more liked or wanted if we do that.

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The Power of our Dreaming


One of the most beautiful parts of my current life is the deep sense of awe and gratitude I frequently feel for the fact that my dream to move to California – a dream I held for so very, very long – finally came true.

Dreams are so often given a bad rap. We are told to “be sensible”, “realistic” or to “take our heads out of the skies”. But I believe our dreams and longings provide a deep guidance to who we really are, to what we really want and to where Life might be trying to guide us.

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Embodied Self-Acceptance: a Pathway to Authentic Leadership


Recently I went to Spirit Rock to listen to Jack Kornfield speak. His is a beautiful energy and whilst I was drawn to his words on the importance of beauty in our lives, what had most effect on me was the power of his presence.

He exudes a rare comfort in himself that is both engaging and empowering to be with.

His talk was not full of clever gimmicks, or visual aids. Neither did he bounce around his stage revving his audience up, as so many motivational speakers are inclined to do. He simply sat with a pile of poetry around his feet, reaching for a poem now and then, with a warm smile of invitation and seemingly little plan.

It had the intimacy of being in a living room with a benevolent relative who was simply talking about what he loves. Which in turn reminded me of what I love. He was simply being himself with no need for performance or production.

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